They're a Lovely Couple, Aren't They?
by Random the Oracle
Summary: Alternate universe fic; Boromir is alive. Correct spellinggrammar. Elegant, varying prose. SLASHROMANCE WARNING: intense slash, EowynArwenBoromir. (plz be a good sport, males only). Probobaly R.
1. Chapter 1?

They're a Lovely Couple, Aren't They?  
Alternate universe fic; Boromir is alive. Correct spelling/grammar.  
Elegant, varying prose. SLASH/ROMANCE WARNING: intense slash,  
Eowyn/Arwen/Boromir. (plz be a good sport, males only). Probobaly R.  
  
She spoke in halting tones as she stared into his eyes and said, "Airy, i... i... I think I'm bisexual". He didn't react to being called Airy, so she knew it was serious. Nevertheless, she continued; "I caught myself staring at Galadriel the other day". She looked Aragorn in the eyes, searching him. Long moments passed. She was about to say more, but Aragorn put his fingers to her lips, drew her close, and said,  
  
"Arwen, I still love you. You can be anything you want to be, and I will still love you". Arwen smiled. They kissed in silent agreement. Arwen knew she would have to deal with this in some way, but right now all that mattered was that she was here with Aragorn and everything would be okay as long as he was here.  
  
Meanwhile, back at the ranch... (Actually Edoras)  
"Eomer, get off your fat ass and pack! We're going to Lothlorien for a reunion with Galadriel and Airy!" snapped Eowyn. Eomer woke with a start. He moaned, suffering the effects of his latest hangover. Eowyn stalked out, but he made no move to pack. In fact, he went back to sleep. After all, it wasn't HIS idea to go to Lothlorien. He heard the clatter of hooves against ground as Eowyn and her escort departed.  
  
As the treetops of Lothlorien grew larger, Eowyn wondered where Eomer was. "That lazy bastard is probobaly home sleeping" she thought contemptuously. And she was right.  
  
About an hour later, Arwen rushed out of Lothlorien to greet Eowyn, jumping up and hugging her tightly, and nearly knocking her off her horse. Aragorn always said they were two Lembas wafers in a leaf. "Where's Eomer?" asked Arwen.  
  
"I don't know." lied Eowyn. "How is Airy?" inquired Eowyn, tilting her head cutely.  
  
"Oh, he's doing quite well." Replied Arwen cordially. "He took a bath last night." "Thank the Valar." She added.  
  
"Lovely." Eowyn responded dryly. They continued the small talk for some time, and it would bore you to read it and me to write it. So anyway, then they ate food.  
  
"The power of our chef is fading. The radiance of the food of Lothlorien is diminishing." Galadriel's voice rang out through the silent dinner table like a mourning wind on a cloudy seashore in the wee hours of the morning.  
  
"It's ok, Gladdy. We'll make do with what you have." Said Eowyn, smiling. The unsettling smile on Galadriel's face faded. The meal continued in silence, though Arwen received more glances than she felt was nesscesary from Eowyn.  
  
After an uneventful night, Arwen woke up to the singing of the birds. The sun was shining. She streched, and got up to greet the day. What a wonderful way to get up. She slipped out of her nightgown and proceeded to dress. She then headed in the direction of the hot springs to bathe.  
  
Having arrived at the hot springs, Arwen tossed aside her clothes and slipped into the water, where her leg encountered something soft and leg- shaped. Eowyn's head peeked out of the water. Arwen did not know how to react to this, so she said, "hi".  
  
"Hi" Eowyn replied pleasantly. There was a long silence. Then arwen snapped,  
  
"You planned this, didn't you?" she glared accusingly.  
  
"Yes. And?" She asked plainly. She had an innocent smile on her face. She drew Arwen closer. Their bare bodies brushed together. Arwen leapt out of the pool, grabbed her clothes, and ran off.  
  
Having not planned this, Arwen was rather thrown off balance, schedule- wise. She decided to visit Airy. Airy was with Boromir, discussing manly things.  
  
"I got this tunic yesterday. Isn't it lovely?" Eowyn heard Boromir say to Aragorn. Arwen stayed with Boz and Airy for the remainder of the afternoon. They had a great time of a perfectly innocent nature; in fact, a better time than Arwen had ever had with a (chaperoned) male. Arwen thought it better not to mention her encounter with Eowyn. Arwen had never really known Boromir before, but decided she really liked him. He had a sort of unpolished charm that she found very appealing. 


	2. The second one

A/N: Sorry Celeborn fans =). It's slash, right? Yeah. No flames plz, it's just a plot device. Sorry it's so short, I'm getting lazy on this story, but I'll be submitting little chunks periodically. I had fun writing this one, so maybe I'll add more soon, who knows. ^^  
  
Arwen spent several days in Lothlorien. They were happy days, and she had no more tawdry encounters with Eowyn, though she was definitely hitting on her. Actually, so was Borimir. And she was married, too! Of all the people she could have went to for advice, she went to Celeborn. He was in his chambers. The door was unlocked. When she knocked, there was no answer. Not in a mood to be polite, she barged in. Celeborn was in there, and the room was filled with smoke. Celeborn held a long pipe limply in his hand. "hi", he said plainly, unperturbed by the uninvited entry. "sit down". Arwen did as she was told. Since Celeborn didn't seem to be in a state to care about sudden subject changes, she blurted,  
  
"I think Borimir is chasing me!". She chose to be quiet about Eowyn for now.  
  
"Well slow down", advised Celeborn. Made sense, at least in Arwen's slightly altered state from the odd fumes in the air.  
  
"Eowyn too", squeaked Arwen.  
  
"Same deal", drawled Celeborn. That was true. Why fight it? Oh. Airy. Whoops. Moral dilemma. Well. Celeborn seemed to have all the answers.  
  
"What about Aragorn?", asked Arwen.  
  
"He can join the fun", replied Celeborn. That was an idea. She wondered how many people would be in her bed in a few weeks.  
  
"Thank you Celeborn!", enthused Arwen, giving him a tight hug.  
  
"You're welcome!", cried Celeborn as Arwen ran from the chamber. 


End file.
